Old Fashion Society

Out with the old and in with the new. Well, I don't think the new way is working out to everyone's benefit. Maybe we can bring back some old fashion ways.

This is not a jab at North American society, and I’m not saying that Dominican Republic or Latin America is perfect, but I do value the old fashion ways carry on in Latin America. Since living in Dominican Republic unless its sports, I don't watch much American TV and I’m not into social media either. My way of keeping up on what's going on is through reading the news daily or if someone sends me a video of something they find amusing. Now from the outside looking in at North American society, what I often see nowadays is a total lack of respect. No respect for self, which in-turns a total disregard towards others. It seems as if it's getting worse by the year, like a car with no brakes and speeding to an obvious destruction. When did it become so comfortable to watch someone in distress? instead to help them, most would rather film it for personal enjoyment. They're going reach to give you a helping hand in Dominican Republic before they reach for a camera. The modern day algorithm pushes the same arguments of men vs women and whoever loves the argument debating formats. I even have a few friends in good relationships watching that junk. Elders here are addressed to as “Señor” and “Señora” which means “Sir” and “Ma'am.” Children are taught from a young age to respect their elders and it sticks with them their whole life. 

In this old fashion society, the elders are treated with respect. I bet that has a big part on why elders here never look their age, or ack it in some cases lol. I’ve gone out to musical events and those types of atmospheres in Dominican Republic, and I always see countless of elders there mixed in with the crowds. They attend these events together or with family, same as younger folks do. The thing is nobody looks at the elders twice or judges them for being out amongst these younger crowds at these live shows. Nobody is putting a time stamp on elders, where they can't still have fun without the worry of being ridiculed. In Dominican Republic there's a term for specific elder men that dress like the young guys and wear the latest fashion styles, they're called “Jevito” and yes to me they stand out more cause it’s not something that I’m used to seeing back in North America. There are no cool points for youngsters talking rude to elders. In fact, that would be a very bad look on one's family, the word would travel around fast and the youngster would receive an unwanted reputation that will far precede them. We’re blessed to get older, and we will become elders eventually, it's good to see that in this society elders are being treated with respect.  

I appreciate my travels throughout Latin America, and I’ve learned so much. In Panama specifically I made lots of friends from Panama, Colombia, Venezuela and Dominican Republic. Everyone is so friendly and well mannered. I never was disrespected or treated unfairly, I was treated so well that I knew this is the culture and society I need to live amongst. They are all different cultures, but yet so similar with their mannerisms. In such a short time these people showed that they are very caring and supportive friends. I can never forget this story, I was on the elevator going down, and the doors open up to a woman that looked like she was in the worst mode ever. It was just myself in the elevator and as she began to walk in, she looks up and says “good morning” (buenos dias). What I got from that has stuck with me ever since. She was visibly upset, but yet, still said good morning. That's how it is in these old fashion societies, the people are always greeting you, saying hello, good morning, good afternoon. I got so used to it, that I began saying hello (in Spanish) to everyone while walking down the street, and I loved it, maybe I over did it lol. A wise person once told me that as simple as hearing good morning can brighten up someone's day. In Dominican Republic it's very common that when you're eating or about to that someone will say to you “buen provecho” which means enjoy your meal. Maybe it makes the meal better, maybe not, we'll never know lol.  

The old fashion way was that if a boy wanted to date someones daughter, he'd have to meet the parents, as well as she would be meeting his parents also. So that all parents can get an understanding and approve of who their kid is going to be around. This old fashion way continues throughout Dominican Republic to this day. Even as adults, it is custom to meet the parents right away, dating is meant to be kept at the minimum. Nobody wants to introduce a new love interest to their parents every month. Outside of this culture some might feel that they move too fast, but one could argue that this way avoids moving too slow and results in the better decisions. Seems like the battle of the sexes have taken flight in North American mainstream, it has gotten some men and women following agitators that only promote division. Highlighting the negatives about one another on TV, while clearing cheques. I'm unaware of any such programs in Dominican Republic, truth is I asked multiple times and I’m told there is no such thing. In an old fashion society, the man doesn't constantly fight the woman and name calls her, he protects her. Have you ever seen those old movies if a guy speaks rude to a woman that she will raise her hand to slap him? That continues in Latin American culture and it doesn't create a big commotion either. The term “latin lover” definitely comes from the examples of relationships lol. In Latin America, let's just say that, the more romantic is the more normal, the more of a gentleman is the more common, the more holding hands is the more ordinary, and the more public display of affection is all the more usual in Latin American culture. 

I hope Latin American culture stays as is, preserving old fashion ways and reframe as much from the modern day North American ways as possible. As a true believer of the quote “if it ain't broke don't fix it.” It's not perfect, but for myself and other expats it works, it's what brought us here and why we remain here. An old fashion society where everyone is looking out for each other, saying hello, making new friends, treating one another with respect. This way of living is euphoria, and it goes along way by keeping you in good spirits, it’s no wonder why the Dominican people are so happy.